WEB SITE ALERT
By John "Big Dog" Snow
Not since Wilt Chamberlain announced in a book that he slept with more
than 20,000 women have I sat up to take notice of a number as I did yesterday
when surfing the internet and coming across the web site www.virtualairlines.com.
This site, run by Gary Kulash, claims that 62 million people have visited
his site! I am surprised that Kulash didn't go all out and just say that
all the visitors were female and that he slept with all 62 million of
Ladies and gentlemen, I took notice of Chamberlain's statement because
it is the truth or very close to it. I take notice of Kulash's statement
because it is beyond reality. 62 million people is equal to more than
20% of the entire United States population. If Kulash is getting this
many hits then I am a fried egg.
If you were to go into any mall in America and poll the shoppers, it
means that out of every 50 shoppers, 10 would be www.virtualairlines.com
I don't recommend you go into a mall and do this, however. If you were
to go into a mall and poll shoppers about Yahoo, America Online or Hotmail,
you would be able to get away with it. If you however go into a mall
and start asking everyone questions about www.virtualairlines.com, no
one at all is likely to have heard of it. And someone is going to call
the police, suspecting that you are really somehow trying to spread anthrax
through the mall, rather than polling about some pip-squeak site called
I called my psychiatrist friend Dr Duerf and asked him what he thought
about such a character, as things go, Dr Duerf was studying the site
as a textbook case of Internet Delusionalisim. Here is what he told me.
Dr Duerf believes that Kulash suffers from deep delusinalisim and can't
distinguish fact from fiction.He believes that Kulash has a deep seated
fixation on the number 62 million and that at some point this will cause
Kulash to mentally shut down. For example, Dr Duerf believes it is possible
that Kulash's delusion could take him back to the Bush-Gore election
controversy. He believes that at some point Kulash may actually believe
that Gore won the election by gaining 62 million votes in Boca Raton,
Florida alone. Dr Duerf believes that Kulash may then sit down in front
of a television for years just eating popcorn and waiting for Gore to
give his presidential acceptance speech. Dr. Duerf points out it could
be years before Kulash would snap out of it.
Dr. Duerf also points to Kulash's statement on his site that he has the
number 2 listened to internet radio web site. Dr Duerf contacted some
internet tracking groups who tell him that no one is listening to Kulash's
radio show. Dr. Duerf believes that in a combined denial-delusional state
Kulash rather than broadcasting out may began to here voices inward.
For example, Dr. Duerf believes Kulash is susceptible to believing that
he is hearing Osama bin Laden's voice.
Dr. Duref believes that Kulash could then believe that he was one of
the suicide bombers that crashed into the World Trade Center. He would
go into a coma and have to be fed intravenously. Dr. Duref believes he
could stay in such a state for years.
Dr. Duref points out that in chronological years Kulash is a young adult
but mentally he is a deranged 9 year old. Dr. Duref points out that in
a state of delusion Kulash used all the names of the major airlines on
his web site, thinking they were his. That is until lawyers from the
airlines got a hold of him and banned him from even mentioning the name
of even defunct airlines in the future. Dr. Duerf points out that Kulash
managed to get more airlines pissed off at him than the terrorists.
Dr Duerf believes it is highly dangerous to visit this site because it
is near impossible to separate fact from fiction and that it is impossible
to pinpoint exactly how Kulash's delusions will manifest themselves
in the future. So Dr. Duerf's advice is that if you must visit this site
make sure you play the "Mr. Rogers" TV theme song in the background as
a kind of subconscious way of re-enforcing the fact that you are in Kulash