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Not too long ago, Mark Avey over at FlightSimX wrote some very nice things about this column (Thanks, Mark, now where do I send the check?). One of the things he mentions is my predilection for pointing out the absurdities of our hobby. Upon reflection, I suppose I do this on occasion, but the really weird thing is, this was never my intent!
The first Corner was featured on FlightSim.Com on August 4, 2005. Three years and now 40 columns later, a few things have happened. Perhaps most importantly, I've developed several good friends with whom I correspond regularly, from all over the globe. It's funny how individuals of widely diverse backgrounds with nothing other than a common "thing" for a stupid computer game are able to find the basis for ongoing relationships via electronic communication. Surely, 20 or so years ago this would not have been conceivable, let alone possible, without our ubiquitous PC's. The very fact that it happens at all is entirely absurd, and to me perhaps the very best part of flight simulation.
Actually, the first thing I ever wrote for any kind of publication was a review of ATCSimulator. I was involved with that project during development, doing voice files and beta testing, and took issue with a review of it posted at FlightSim.Com. After exchanging emails, the author finally suggested I simply write one myself. And as is said, the rest is history.
But again, when doing these articles, I was originally just jotting down whatever happened to come my way by way of thought. As you might imagine, that is often a rather lonely and desolate wait. And then the more I wrote, the more obvious it became that my hobby was, well, silly. I would really find myself stashing away my little hat with the reflector thingys on it whenever one of my kid's friends would be at the house. After all, I'm a DAD. As we all know, Dad's don't play with toys. They work. They sweat. They fix broken things, and grunt and drink Scotch and smoke cigars. Somehow, that mental image just didn't fit with that of yours truly, sitting behind an ersatz flight yoke wearing a funny hat and talking to a make believe air traffic controllers. And I had a moment of clarity usually reserved for those who spend years in meditation (or medication, but that's another story): this is truly absurd.
It's been, what... this is the 40th Corner, right? Through it all, I've heard stories from around the globe. People commiserating, comparing scars, trading pictures of our set-ups. Ages spanning from teens to octogenarians. We are all the same! Some a little bit more wrinkly than others, sure. But we all chase this absurd desire to make believe we know how to fly airplanes! That's it. Absurd? Absolutely.
But the passion! Think about it for a moment. Just how many 'angles' are there to our hobby? We have those who just use the program. We have those who develop freeware. We've payware developers, painters, mission builders. There are writers, tweakers, advisers, wannabe's, coulda-beens. People who are developer groupies. For a while I was particularly enamored with a certain company, until the day I needed some technical assistance, and learned all about how it feels to be ignored until one has a near-death experience from the aggravation of it. And we have the window and rivet counters. Certainly, there is a significant portion out there that, no matter what is provided to them, will remain unsatisfied and unfulfilled. I recently did a manual for a product, and was just ignorant enough to ask in a post about people's opinion of the manual. I was actually told that I should have not only reproduced the entire Pilot Operating Manual, but also have provided a DVD video displaying the operation of the aircraft. I worked on that manual for weeks. Months. I was so damn pleased with how it came out. I really, really wanted to show how to use this aircraft, and wracked my brain trying to put it in terms that would educate the noobs while not alienating the more experienced and sophisticated sim pilots. I believe I was smashingly successful at neither. There is absurdity in there somewhere.
But back to passion. I can't think of too many genres of video game that have had the longevity of flight simulation. Is it the improvement in the graphics? The complexity of the hardware/software? Or is it simply a matter of the subject, and the human desire to break the bonds of gravity? Personally, I like it because it affords me the need to upgrade hardware on a regular basis. But that's my dirty little secret, and intend to tell no-one.
The simple depth of devotion to this hobby is absurd. Coin collecting is cool. I used to collect coins from around the world. I had a bunch of hobby stores that would get from some place or another all these foreign coins. They'd just drop them into all these coffee cans. I'd spend hours sitting in these stores going through them, picking out anything that caught my fancy and that I'd need for my collection. It got me out. I was viewing history. Oh, if only they could talk, can you imagine the stories a coin could tell you?
For a while, I was very much into racquetball. Played for years. I'd regularly get my butt kicked in tournaments, but that didn't matter. I loved to play. Was passionate about the game.
I was that way about ice skating. I played hockey for 20 years or so. I made a couple of dollars as a linesman and referee, officiating anything from the Mites through adult leagues. Passion and income. Nice when you can get it!
I built ship models. I especially loved doing square rigged sailing ships, with all those neat ropes and knots and stuff. I even did a little bit of work at a local museum restoring some of their models. I loved doing that.
But now it's flight simulation. Of all this stuff I've enjoyed, how in God's name did I end up here? I have no idea. But I am certain that I am not alone. Quite to the contrary, the company I keep is broader and more diverse than in any other hobby in which I've participated. I'd thought this could be due to the fact that as a lard-butt, I liked it as I could do it sitting down. But many of those I've met are actually quite active and revoltingly thin and in shape. You, know... freaks.
So I have no idea. I've thought about it, talked about it, wrote about it. I've played this stupid game until I was sick of it, and shut down my computer in disgust. I've beta'd, recorded, suggested, complained, assisted. And now that I think of it, maybe the clue is in all that stuff. There's so much more to flight simulation than just flying. There's... well, I don't think I need to go into how much more there is to it. But I'll tell you, there's a boat load more than I'd ever imagined there was when I first started getting interested in it.
Grown men and a handful of women, all playing a flight simulation game. Talking about it. Designing things for it. Obsessing about it! Arguing about it!
Absurd? Ask yourself this question: Do I own a V-Speed chart?
Three Green!
Chip Barber
rfbarber2@verizon.net
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